The Top 10 Things You Need To Know

(as told through some of our most prime text convos)

10.  This is our favorite game:

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9.  He has some promising ideas…

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8.  We have an agreement that if we’re both 40 and still single, we’re marrying each other. We’ve already discussed our sexual preferences.

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(On an aside, the article in question is this work of genius: http://www.nerve.com/advice/ridiculous-tips/the-best-of-ridiculous-tips-for-a-miserable-sex-life-emcosmopolitan-em-edition)

7.  Sometimes we are terrible people.

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6.  I’m not allowed to blue-ball him. But more importantly, he needs to learn to group his thoughts appropriately.

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5.  Sometimes he can be very insensitive.

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4.  Douchebags, be warned. He’ll know you when he sees you.

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3.  He’s kinda handsome in a panda-type way.

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2.  We know how to party.

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1.  His favorite drink is The Desire.

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